Intro/Recap

Live and please God, more and more, by…

  1. Have sex like you know God
  2. Work like you know God.
  3. Grieve like you know God.

We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, concerning those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve like the rest, who have no hope.

1 Thessalonians 4:13

Good Grief

…just ask Charlie Brown!

Before we talk about what it says, I want you to notice what it doesn’t say. It doesn’t say, “so that you will not grieve.” I mean, it does say that, but the sentence doesn’t end there.

Grief is normal, natural, and necessary. I know most rational people would agree with that statement in theory, but in reality, we’re not very good at dealing with grief and loss; not in ourselves and not with other people. In both cases it makes us uncomfortable. So we try to stuff it, ignore it, drown it out, move on. And we pay the price, in our mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical wellbeing.

And followers of Christ are not immune to this. We do it, too, and in some cases, I think even more so. In our right & good desire to be an encouragement, it’s easy to have the opposite effect. Ever had that happen?

Between being a pastor’s grandkid, kid, and a pastor myself, funerals have been a part of my life from the earliest age, more than the average person. Can give you a hint? Just be there, that’s the most important thing you can do. Sometimes we feel the need to say something, when in reality there’s nothing you can see. But you can be there to care for them, cry with them, walk with them through the grief, and not just for a couple weeks, however long it takes.

That’s all in response to other people’s grief. For ourselves, grief can be difficult to navigate as a believer because it can feel like a lack of faith.

It’s not, and we know this for certain in particular because of John 11. That’s the story of Jesus & Lazarus. When Jesus gets to the tomb, you have these two words:

Jesus wept.

John 11:35

Why? Because one of his closest friends had died, that’s why. And because…

Death is our mortal enemy.

It may seem silly to you that I even take time to point that out, but some people try to escape reality by proposing that maybe death isn’t so bad, just how we think about it. Maybe it’s even a good thing. If you don’t believe me, just read some comments online.

Even the language has changed over the past few years. It’s gone from doctor-assisted suicide, which has that negative word in there, then the Right to Die, and now the term is even more positive and upbeat—the death with dignity movement. Maybe people should be able to choose when/how they want to die, maybe people should be paid to help them acheive their goal.

But that’s an oxymoron, there’s nothing dignified about it. To put it in the words of the singer/songwriter Jason Isbell, at the end of a song about a young woman dying of cancer:

There’s one thing that’s real clear to me
No one dies with dignity
We just try to ignore the elephant somehow

Jason Isbell

Death is ugly. It’s quite literally dehumanizing—a person was there before, and now it’s just an empty shell of what they used to be. It’s the culmination of everything that’s gone wrong with the world—peak brokenness on display. That’s what the Bible teaches. It’s not a good thing—it’s a terrible thing.

So we don’t have to pretend otherwise, to God or to each other. For those who loved someone, death is like an amputation—you’re missing a part of yourself. People always say, “At least we know where they are.” And they mean well—yes and amen, we’re glad to know where they are—but that’s doesn’t change the fact that they’re not here, where we are.

Family, it’s okay to grieve. If Jesus cried when his friend died, it’s okay for you to do so as well.

We grieve, we just do it differently than other people, because we have hope. And Paul’s about to layout a very logical argument for our hope, because he doesn’t want believers to be uninformed.

In the Christian life, ignorance is not bliss. On the contrary, it causes a lot of unnecessary pain and suffering. So let’s not be ignorant, let’s be informed. What do we need to know in order to grieve with hope?

For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, in the same way, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep.

1 Thessalonians 4:14

Jesus’ Death & Resurrection Changes Everything

Paul begins his logic here, with this conditional statement.

IF we believe Jesus died and they came back alive again,
THEN those who died in him will also come back to life again.

What’s the foundation of our hope in the midst of grief? In one word, Jesus, the Word made flesh. He died and rose again. If He did, and we’re in Him, then He’ll do the same for us.

These two things are inextricably linked: if you believe in one, you have to believe the other by default.

“I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me, even if he dies, will live.

John 11:25

…and not in some symbolic, spiritual sense, either. When we say the word resurrection, it’s not a metaphor for something else. No, we’re talking about human bodies that were dead, not being dead anymore.

It changes how we understand death.

Pretty much every culture uses metaphors and euphemisms to talk about death. For instance, we say that people have passed away, passed on, or just simply passed.

Did you notice the phrase “those who have fallen asleep”? We still use that terminology quite a bit actually.

Why use that phrase? Why say it like that? For anyone who’s ever grieved the loss of someone close to them, that seems to be underselling it a bit, don’t you think?

He has good precedent for it, look at what Jesus said to his disciples back in John 11 again:

“Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep,
but I’m on my way to wake him up.”

John 11:11

Then the disciples are like, “Oh, good, he’s sleeping well, best thing for you when you’re sick. He’ll be alright.” So Jesus tells them painly, “Lazarus has died.”

It’s easy to understand the metaphor in Lazarus’ case, because we know how the story ends, right? Lazarus comes out of the grave.

Just a few weeks later, Jesus would come out of the grave. And if we believe that’s true, now we know how our story ends—the exact same way!

Over and over again, in the OT and especially the NT, Scriptures refers to believers who have died as falling asleep, being asleep, lying down, and being at rest.

But do you notice that it doesn’t refer to Jesus in the same way. Never once does it say that Jesus fell asleep, it always says he died.

It’s not because the authors want to soften the blow of death. It’s because Jesus took the full blow of death so that for those who trust in Him, it could be peaceful, restful sleep.

For him to raise the dead is as easy as it is for you to wake someone up. (that illustration falls apart if you have teenagers in the house!)

With Lazarus, he calls out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” In Mark 5, he raised a 12 year old girl from the dead. As he walks into the house, all the mourners are there, and he says, ‌“Why are you making a commotion and weeping? The child is not dead but asleep.” And everybody laughed at him. He sent everybody out, took the little girl by the hand, and quietly said, “Little girl, get up!”

Death is impossible for us to escape; nothing is impossible with God.

Not Soul Sleep

The point of using the image of sleep to describe death is illustrate that it’s a temporary state. When someone’s asleep, they’re going to get up in the morning. If they’re not going to get up again, we call that… death.

Some people read more into these verses than is there, believe that it refers to soul sleep, which is is the idea that people are simply unconscious between their death and resurrection. That when you close your eyes in death, the next moment you’ll be aware of is the resurrection.

That is decidedly not the point here. We don’t have to go into all the reasons that can’t possibly be true, but Scripture is clear that to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. but being absent from the body is not our ultimate state.

A human being is imcomplete without a body. If God didn’t care about our bodies, why raise Jesus from the dead? “Eh, His spirit’s in heaven, it’s just his body.” That’s not what God did with Jesus’ body, and it’s not what he’ll do with your body, either.

The death and resurrection of Jesus
changes how we understand death.

It changes how we understand life after life after death.

Yes, I stutter; no, I wasn’t stuttering just then!

That’s a phrase I believe original by N.T. Wright, and it’s a quick and easy way to explain the difference between what happens immediately after you die and what this passage is talking about.

If you die tomorrow (please don’t!), there will be life after death. Your spirit will immediately be in the presence of Jesus in paradise. But that’s not your final destination. One day, you’ll come back… when Jesus comes back. Let’s keep reading.

For we say this to you by a word from the Lord: We who are still alive at the Lord’s coming will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the archangel’s voice, and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are still alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord.

1 Thessalonians 4:15

We are going to dig into more of these details next week, for now we’re just going to hit the high points and try to understand how they relate to grieving with hope.

No doubt, Paul had taught them about the resurrection to come when he was with them. But it seems that these new believers are confused and concerned about those brothers and sisters who have passed away before Jesus returns. Are they going to miss out?

“Miss out?!” says Paul, “On the contrary, they’re actually going to get to go first!”

Jesus’ shout, “Lazarus, come out!”. Next time, it won’t be just Lazarus.

Now What?

Center your hope on
life after life after death.

RESURRECTION HOPE

I told you I’ve been to a lot of funerals in my time. I was thinking this week, what’s the biggest difference between the message I’ve heard at most funerals, and the message of hope in the NT… this is it.

It’s the apostle Paul’s logic in these verses. He set out to tell them (and us) what we need to know so that we don’t grieve like the others, who have no hope. You know what he didn’t say? “It’s okay, they’re in heaven now, and one day you’ll die and go to heaven, too, and you’ll see them again.”

Isn’t that the basic message you’ve heard at most funerals? And a lot of the time, (majority?) that’s basically it.There’s nothing inherently wrong with that statement… but it’s also never where Scripture calls us to place our hope. It’s not a matter of wrong theology, just wrongly placed emphasis.

This is how you encourage grieving people

Same thing that’s true for the Thessalonians is true for us today. Last line in chapter 4:

Therefore encourage one another with these words.

1 Thessalonians 4:18

When you see someone hurting, grieving the loss of someone they love, first of all, acknowledge the pain their experiencing. And then, with the Spirit’s leading to know when it’s the right time, encourage them with these words, with these truths. For those who are in Christ, death is not the end. Death is temporary, and will be defeated.

Christian hope is not optimism. It is not positivity or an upbeat mood or a motivational state. It is not the general feeling that things are going to get better, or that everything is going to be okay.

Christian hope is not escapism. It is not the view that the world is just going to get darker and darker but God is going to get us out of here one day.

Christian hope is not progress. It does not emerge from potential or possibility. It is not the belief that human ingenuity or technology or the brain trust of the world will sort things out.

Christian hope is resurrection and new creation.

Resurrection does not arise inevitably from the grave. Resurrection comes suddenly after death. It arrives out of nowhere. It is an interruption, an intrusion, an intervention. History for the Christian is neither linear nor circular; it is angular. It is an intersection of a wholly different line into the lines of space and time, creating a new trajectory altogether. New creation is the surprising redemption and unexpected completion and perfection of creation.

Christian hope is the confident expectation, grounded in God’s promise and faithfulness revealed in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, that Christ will come again in glory, that death will be swallowed up in victory and we will receive resurrection bodies, and that heaven and earth will be made new and one.

Glenn Packiam

Are you a follower of Christ? Do you have hope? You can.

When the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed. Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled:

Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?

For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Corinthians 15:52, 54–57

That day is not yet, but oh, that day is coming.

Oh, we should grieve the loss, and grieve we will, but we do it differently.

There’s tears of joy mixed into the tears of pain. We’re sorrowful, but always rejoicing.